To Google or to Goggle?

The area in which I live was the first in Britain to be switched over to the new, improved digital television receivers.

At the time, I must have been one of only a handful of people who didn't rush out to buy a "digi-box" which would have enabled me to get the new, digital signal once the old, analogue signal was turned off. 

"Why not?", I hear all five of you readers calling out simultaneously (I'm very impressed you managed that, dear readers!). "Why didn't you rush out to buy a digi box?"  (Wow, you must have been practising together!).

I'll tell you why. Because there's nothing on television that interests me! It's mostly rubbish.

Ok, I say "nothing" that interests me. There are a few programmes that I'd miss if I didn't have access to any tv at all. But I inevitably get to watch some "moving pictures" at my mum's house, and my friend Karen's flat. Whether I want to or not!

My retired mum, true to stereotype, loves "Murder She Wrote" but, since Auntie Beeb began moving it all around the afternoon schedule, Mum lost track, and lost interest. She's now a firm addict of "CSI Miami/CSI NY/ CSI In Your Kitchen ("what is this sticky, incredibly sugary stuff - the Lab is stumped...) CSI Whatever". It's a slightly worrying trend. But she's also added "Boston Legal" to her favourites menu. I approve because it stars Captain Kirk!

Karen, on the other hand, works a serious 9-6 job, and likes to get home, make her tea, and zone out in front of the telly. She likes whatever the reality/talent tv show of the moment is. In the past year, we have together watched "Strictly Celebrity Come Dancing", "Dancing on Ice", "The X Factor" and "Britain's Got Talent". I happily get into the spirit of all these talent shows. An acquaintance of mine, who doesn't know me very well yet, was amazed that I was watching "Dancing on Ice". When I asked him why he was surprised, he said that he couldn't imagine me watching something so mindless, when I seemed so, so...... he trailed off at this point. Yeah, I fully admit that he stopped short of saying "intelligent", but the word was implied. What he had failed to remember was that I have a history of working in the theatre, in Pantomime, to be precise. And Pantomime is King (and Queen, and Princess, and the Ugly Sisters), when it comes to cheese, tat, base emotions, happy endings, and all things sparkly. Of course I like these shows! It's in my genes (as are jinni's!)! 

When they're on, I get into full boo-ing and cheering mode. In true theatre technician stylee, I also give a running commentary on the lighting design and cues (my area of expertise), the costume design, the camera direction (in which I'm also trained - so think I am an authority on), not to mention the actual performances.

Karen used to get exasperated at my non-stop commentary, until she learned what most of my friends have learned - she now either blocks it out, or joins in. And we both love singing at the top of our voices to the music tracks!

But now we are in the time of no talent shows (unless you count "America's Got Talent", which I don't - that should just be called "Nutters Showing Themselves Up on TV" - sorry, any American readers, but you've got to agree, you are the Land of the Free, with a high percentage of very strange people! - nothing personal!). Now it is another show which the nation somehow chooses to follow. Yup, we're well into "Big Brother", a reality, rather than talent format (the "reality" being that the participants have no talent!).

I don't like BB. I watched the first series, as I'm interested in psychology (even though I have to spellcheck the word), and wanted to see if I could work out exactly why anyone would want to take part in such a show? We're now onto BB series 172, and I'm no closer to getting an answer. (The producers have promised that this is the very last series of BB - ever. I don't believe them.)

Now, on the one hand, I don't understand why Karen wants to sit and watch a bunch of fame-hungry retards  so-called ordinary people sitting around being bored for however many lifetimes the series lasts. But, on the other hand, I do understand that the show gives her something to chat about with her workmates.

For her part, Karen (who doesn't have a computer, let alone an Internet connection) can't understand how I apparently spend so much time on the Internet. She thinks it's anti-social, and worries about me (I would say she worries about me becoming introverted - but she knows me better than to worry about that ever happening!). I have tried explaining to her that the Internet is a whole other world, populated by real (or fictitious - I'm not fictitionist) people, people who are communicating with each other, sometimes over vast distances, and from different time zones. To me, it's an amazing tool of information and communication at your fingertips. It makes the World a village. A village in my sitting room.

So we have agreed to differ, at least until the end of the current (and, hopefully, final) series of BB.

Meantime, I'll sit it out, uncomplaining, because by that time, the new series of "Shameless" should be starting. And Karen and I both love "Shameless"!